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  • Writer's pictureSamuel Jacobs

Atheist pretends to be Christian, gets into heaven, proves God is an idiot.

Updated: May 19, 2020

Even though Harry Q. Franklin of Corona, CA is an atheist and doesn't believe in Jesus Christ or his teachings, wanted to test out a theory and live a Christian life so he can get into heaven, and fool God.

Also known as Pascal's Wager, the idea is there is no possible way to know if Christianity (or any theist religion) is true. So why not live a Christian lifestyle in case it is? That way you can get into heaven without actually being a Christian.

When asked why, this is what Harry Franklin had to say, "I'm a rebel. I don't want to live by their rules. If I want to get into heaven, I don't have to believe in something stupid like Jesus or God. I only have to pretend to believe, and I still get the payout."

We asked God to comment, and needless to say, he was absolutely dumbfounded,

“He completely fooled me. It's a loophole." says God. "He would quote scripture and speak out against gay marriage. There was even a time he egged a mosque at Christmas shouting out 'Jesus is the reason for the season.'"

The Administrators of Heaven were given a harsh talking to when God found out about this loophole. A lot of them were fired from their positions, some which have held them for over 6000 years.

Must Honor Agreement Heaven's lawyers have poured over scripture night and day to see if they have to indeed honor the agreement of allowing Mr. Franklin into heaven and according to their own text, they must.

But it's not that easy getting the rules of heaven changed, considering they were created on day one.There are committees that must pass the motion, and a vote must be taken. Then it was one supreme being that made the by-laws, Currently there are over 60 people in heaven.

"That little bastard." said one of the Heavenly Lawyers, "It's always the atheists that screw things up for us. He couldn't just live his life like he believes, he had to want to come here to and cause havoc. With heaven now being open for atheists, I bet we now see an onslaught of disbelievers trying to get in."


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