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  • Writer's pictureSamuel Jacobs

Vatican refuses to clean up slime trail left behind by Card. George Pell.

Cardinal George Pell was convicted of sexual abuse but is released from prison, but what of his slime trail?

PERTH, AU. One of the most powerful men in the Roman Catholic Church, Cardinal George Pell who was found guilty of one charge of sexual penetration of a child and four charges of an indecent act with or in the presence of a child in the late 1990s was freed from prison after Australia's High Court unanimously overturned his conviction on five counts of historical child sex abuse.

The Vatican is overjoyed with the decision, but refuses to acknowledge one thing about the Cardinal, the large trail of slime that follows him where ever he goes.

The amount of slime has almost reached toxic levels and burns to the touch. It has left the drinking water undrinkable. When asked a member of the Geneva Convention how much it will cost to clean up the slime, they estimated that it would cost between $250 and $300 million dollars.

The slime has penetrated all corners of Australia, New Zealand and has made its way over to Hawaii, If it's not controlled, they are going to have to declare it an international emergency.

"We have to hire all the freelance pressure washers to work 24/7 for weeks just to make a dent in it.


Entire cities are going to have to be closed at a time while they disinfect the area. Children should be kept inside. The world may not recover from this.


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