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Cincinnati Bengals lost because they didn't pray hard enough, says God.
There is a reason that the Cincinnati Bengals didn't win the Superbowl, God says they just didn't pray hard enough. As with all previous years before, usually the winner of the Super Bowl® is the team that is the most faithful and religious. But for some reason, the Cincinnati Bengals, who used to be the most pious, fell short of God's good graces this year. "Normally we pray 10-15 times a day. we haven't been in a Superbowl since '89?" said Joe Burrow in an interview yesterd

Christians: "Ban Harry Potter 'devil books', pray on our book of magic instead."
Christian leaders still have a hard-on for the Harry Potter books calling them evil because they are full of magic, and want you to read their book of magic instead. In the United States and abroad, Christian leaders and followers have protested the sale of Harry Potter books because they are full of magic and wizardry, which they think is linked to the devil. Even though the characters in the book are using their magic to fight off evil, it doesn't matter, because that brand

BREAKING: "Accidental" red sock in heaven's laundry makes angels pink.
During Lucifer's visit over Christmas, a red sock was accidentally washed with all the white frocks, causing all the angel frocks in heaven to be pink. When "accidents" happen in heaven, it usually causes a ripple throughout the universe. In this case, one of Lucifer's red socks was washed with all of the white angel's garb, and the ending result is pink angels. "I don't know how that happened?" Remarked, Lucifer, the prince of darkness. "I normally go home to do laundry, bec

Christianity must be true, why else would you give up an awesome god like Odin?
Sometimes we have to face facts, it may not be the news we like to hear, but Christianity must be real, because we would be stupid just to give up a God that promotes drinking, sex. Odin is a widely revered god in Germanic mythology. Norse mythology, the source of most surviving information about him, associates Odin with wisdom, healing, death, royalty, the gallows, knowledge, war, battle, victory, sorcery, poetry, frenzy, and the runic alphabet, and depicts him as the husba

Muslims leaving Islam in droves when revealed 72 virgins are creepy incels.
Islam promises 72 virgins in heaven, but the concept of virgin has changed in recent years. One of the promises Islam makes to its followers is that when they reach the afterlife and if they followed the religion as requested, they will receive 72 virgins in heaven. But due to a loophole in the Qu'ran, and the way world has embraced sexuality, it is very unusual to find virgins who are not incel males Incels, a combination of the words "involuntary celibates", and are members